For an example of a policy see Brothers of Charity Relationships and Sexuality Policy here. Please note legal or regulatory information in the policy may not be up to date.
Supported Loving toolkit
Writing a relationships and sexuality policy
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Having a relationships and sexuality policy is an essential foundation for building responsive practices that meet regulatory, legal, and ethical standards.
Creating a Relationships and Sexuality Policy is essential for any social care organisation aiming to support people’s rights to love, intimacy, and self-expression. A well-written policy ensures that everyone, from staff to the people you support, understands their rights, responsibilities, and the organisation’s approach to relationships and sexuality. This toolkit page will help you develop or update your policy to reflect your values, meet legal, regulatory, and ethical standards, and promote positive, rights-based practices.
Why you need a policy?
A clear and inclusive Relationships and Sexuality Policy brings a lot of benefits. It creates consistency by setting a shared approach across your organisation and helps people understand their rights and how they’ll be supported. For staff, it provides guidance on handling sensitive issues with clarity, while encouraging best practices through up-to-date, person-centred approaches. It also sets clear boundaries and safeguarding measures to ensure everyone’s safety. Ultimately, it shows respect by recognising relationships and sexuality as key parts of being human, helping create an environment where people feel valued and supported.
What should be included in a policy?
Every policy should reflect your organisation’s values and priorities, while covering the essential topics that matter most:
Values: Set out your commitment to supporting relationships, love, and sexuality as essential to wellbeing. Make it clear that everyone is valued and supported in exploring relationships and intimacy in a way that works for them, with respect for diverse sexual orientations, gender identities, and cultural backgrounds.
Rights and responsibilities: Set out the rights of people who access support to make choices about relationships, intimacy, and boundaries. Clearly define staff responsibilities to ensure accountability and support for these rights.
Relationships: Highlight the importance of choice in relationships, ensuring people can make their own decisions about who they form relationships with and how they express themselves. This includes supporting individuals in forming healthy, consensual relationships. Acknowledge and support diverse relationships and expressions, including LGBTQ+ identities, respecting each person’s experiences and identity.
Legal framework: Summarise key legislation such as the Human Rights Act (1998), Mental Capacity Act (2005), Sexual Offences Act (2003), and Care Act (2014) and how they support sex, relationships and sexuality. It’s crucial to provide an understanding of the legal backdrop that protects people’s rights to love, intimacy, and relationships.
Sexuality and sexual practices: Provide guidance on how to support individuals with topics like relationships, friendships, masturbation, pornography, social media and online relationships, menstruation, and pregnancy. These can be sensitive topics, so offering clear, respectful support helps people navigate them with confidence and dignity.
Sexual health and safety: Incorporate preventative safeguarding measures by providing support and information upfront to help avoid potential abuse. Ensure staff are trained to recognise early signs of risk and are equipped with the knowledge to address concerns before they escalate. Offer education on topics like consent, healthy relationships, and sexual health to empower individuals with the information they need to make informed decisions and protect themselves.
Training and support: Provide guidance on training and resources for staff and people using the service. Regular training helps staff build confidence and competence in supporting relationships and sexuality. Emphasise the importance of ongoing education to keep everyone informed and ensure they feel supported in making decisions.
Accessible formats: Ensure that the policy is available in easy-read and other accessible formats to ensure it’s accessible to everyone. This is particularly important to ensure that people with learning disabilities, communication difficulties, or other needs can fully understand and engage with the policy.
Confidentiality and privacy: Clearly define how personal and intimate information will be handled, ensuring privacy and confidentiality are respected. Emphasise the importance of consent in sharing personal information and the steps taken to protect individuals' rights to confidentiality.
Review, evaluation and accountability: Regularly review and update the policy to stay effective and in line with legislation and the needs of the people supported. Monitor implementation through audits and feedback, ensuring staff accountability and providing opportunities for concerns or suggestions.
What are the most common challenges faced in this area and how best to support people to overcome them?
Legal complexity: One of the biggest worries is getting the legal side wrong. This fear can stall progress, leaving gaps in support. The solution is to seek advice from legal experts, use trusted resources, and attend relevant training to build your knowledge. Breaking the legal side into manageable parts linked to real-world practice can also help simplify the process.
Scope: The wide-ranging nature of relationships and sexuality can feel overwhelming. It’s easy to feel like you need to cover everything at once. To address this, focus on your organisation’s values and priorities, and address the most pressing needs first. Acknowledge that your policy can evolve over time as new issues arise or as your team becomes more confident in its approach.
Resistance: Concerns or resistance from staff or families can make the process feel even harder. These concerns are often rooted in misunderstanding or fear of change. The key to addressing this is involving people early and often. Engage staff, people you support, families, and external experts in the process. By creating space for their voices and experiences, you’ll build ownership, understanding, and support for the policy.
Cultural sensitivity: Navigating differing cultural or religious views around relationships and sexuality can feel tricky. Encourage open dialogue and respect diverse perspectives while keeping the rights and needs of people you support at the centre.
Fear of making mistakes
Staff might worry about saying or doing the wrong thing when addressing sensitive topics. Provide clear guidance and training to help them feel confident and informed.
Watch Sue Sharples talk about developing an inclusive organisational relationships and sexuality policy and procedure.
Do...
- review and update regularly to ensure the policy remains relevant and effective
- involve people you support in feedback to understand their experiences and improve the policy
- monitor policy implementation through audits and staff accountability checks
- provide clear channels for people to raise concerns or make suggestions.
Don't...
- let the policy become outdated, failure to review regularly can lead to gaps in support
- ignore feedback from people using services or staff; it’s key to making improvements
- skip accountability, ensure staff are held responsible for upholding the policy
- let the policy be published quietly! Have a launch for it, make a fuss about it so staff know it exists.
Case study
A social care organisation identified a gap in support around relationships and sexuality for the people they supported. Recognising the need for clear guidance, they formed a working group made up of people they support, support staff, and managers to develop a policy that would reflect the needs and rights of the individuals they served. The group began by creating an easy-read booklet titled *"Understanding My Rights in Relationships and Intimacy,"* which offered practical advice on navigating relationships, staying safe, and setting boundaries.
They sought training from experts in sexuality and safeguarding to ensure that everyone involved had the knowledge to offer the right support and create a safer, more inclusive environment. The group also worked closely with external advisors, including advocacy groups, to ensure the policy was not only person-centred but also aligned with best practice and legal frameworks.
After several rounds of feedback from service users and staff, the working group finalised a comprehensive Relationships and Sex Policy. This policy provided a clear framework for supporting relationships, intimacy, and sexual health and included accessible versions in easy-read and audio formats, ensuring that everyone could engage with it, regardless of their communication needs.
The policy has since become fully embedded in the organisation's daily practice, creating a safer, more supportive environment for the people they support. It has also been praised as a model of good practice by other organisations looking to implement similar policies. This initiative shows how collaboration, continuous learning, and a commitment to empowering service users can lead to meaningful, positive change in social care.
Top tips
- Collaborate: Work with people, families, staff, trustees, and volunteers to create a shared vision. Host focus groups or distribute surveys to gather input.
- Consult experts: Seek advice from legal professionals, sexual health specialists, and networks like Supported Loving.
- Customise: Avoid copying policies directly from other organisations. Tailor your policy to reflect your unique values and practices.
- Test it: Share drafts widely, including in accessible formats, and invite feedback before finalising.
- Keep it alive: Regularly review and update your policy to reflect new laws, research, and feedback. Train staff on how to use it effectively.
The views expressed in the Supported Loving toolkit are not necessarily those of Choice Support.
Resources
Brothers of Charity - Relationships and Sexuality Policy
Shropshire joint policy - Personal Relationships and Sexuality
For an example of a policy see Shropshire joint policy-Personal Relationships and Sexuality here. Please note legal or regulatory information in the policy may not be up to date
West Sussex Adult Services - Personal Relationships for Adults with a Learning Disability
West Sussex Adult Services. Personal Relationships for Adults with a Learning Disability - read it here.
Open University/Together for Short Lives - Guidance and standards
Open University/Together for Short Lives. Talking about sex, sexuality and relationships: For those working with young people with life-limiting or life-threatening conditions. Guidance and Standards.
Guidelines for Implementing a Policy on ‘Sexuality and Relationships for Disabled Adults’ in the Voluntary Sector
SHADA. Guidelines for Implementing a Policy on ‘Sexuality and Relationships for Disabled Adults’ in the Voluntary Sector.
Care Quality Commission (CQC) has provided guidance for providers, (Relationships and sexuality in adult social care services, 2019) Microsoft Word - 20190110 Sexuality in Care V0.09 Clean for approval_PUBLICATION.docx (cqc.org.uk).
Supported Loving toolkit
The Supported Loving network has produced a series of guides to help support people with issues surrounding sexuality and relationships.
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Supported Loving network
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